“Your biography is the farthest thing from your destiny. Biography does not determine destiny, your decisions do.” Tony Robbins
As I’m preparing to start the process of obtaining some additional coaching credentials, I’ve started to look at the already established coaching and motivational experts in the field. One of the most credible is Tony Robbins, someone who I’ve followed for quite some time now but now I’m really starting to study his approach and work.
In watching one of his interviews a while back, I remember him making the statement above and of course I had to look into his story. Ultimately, his statement above proves that in spite of any circumstances or situations you may be born into, find yourself in or experiencing as a result of “biography”, the sheer existence of these situations has nothing to do with your destiny, in terms of any negative, or positive impact for that matter, at least not in their existence alone. What matters is what decisions you make in the face of your biography.
So, a while back, I actually starting piecing together a little bit of my biography, more in an effort to take a different approach to the next level of self-discovery for me and what I started to find was that in of being the daughter of a woman who grew up with very little, who was the daughter of a woman who worked for her bread literally every day before the sun came up and long after the sun went down, who was the daughter of a woman who, simply put, was just poor, my biography would tell you that all of us women really didn’t have a future, nothing significant to look forward to, really very few things to live for. But because all of the women before me were destiny-focused, they made decisions that determined a more positive destiny for each and every one of them. You can literally see the progression of quality of life, existence, success, prosperity, good health, etc through the generations of these women and then there’s me, positioned to look back, take their inspiration, and determine how to move forward toward my own destiny. And it all boils down to what decisions I have made, make day in and day out, and what decisions I will make over the remaining course of my life.
What does this all mean? Well, I actually think it’s really simple:
No matter who you are, who you came from, what circumstances under which you were brought into this world, if you can embrace, visualize, and begin to work toward experiencing the destiny that is yours, you will live a life in which you make decisions based on what will advance you toward your destiny and limit the decisions that may take away from progressing toward your destiny.
See, I think we’re the ones that really make things difficult…were human. We like to blame people, circumstances and situations for why we are in the positions in life that we find ourselves. That perspective does not exhibit that of one who is focused on their destiny. This is really “soft”, I know so it may still be a little tough to grasp. So here are a few examples
- Ray Charles-blind, yet surpassed many expectations around his success based on decisions he made that have now made him a legend. Though there were many big decisions that limited his rate of progression, he consistently got himself back on track toward his destiny and is now honored in so many ways.
- Tina Turner-as if anything else needs to be said…from meager beginnings to horrible life circumstances that she experienced, even now when you hear her speak, she talks about “having arrived” and just living in gratitude every day because she has met her destiny, lived it, loved it, experienced it.
- President Obama-your political opinions aside, c’mon, a biracial boy, raised by a single mother…now the President of the United States. Not luck….destiny-focused decision-making.
Now, what do the fabulously fierce do from here? Well,
First, we start to articulate the destiny we know is ours. Pray about it, meditate on it, really take it in, and write it down. No need to go screaming from the mountain tops with this one. This is all about you just articulating it for yourself.
Second, think about and make note of the characteristics of your biography that you may have used as crutches in the past or as excuses for why you may have done things or not done things you should’ve. For example, growing up, we didn’t travel much…or at all really. We just didn’t have the funds. So I actually would limit my perspective by focusing in on where we lived and the surrounding areas. I didn’t pick up books about places that were interesting…assuming why should I, I’ll never be able to go there? Not destiny–focused perspective at all. Don’t worry, I grew out of that perspective quick and early!
Third, accept your biography as just your foundation, your launch pad and you determine how much elevation you’ll take on through the decisions you’re going to make. Do this by making three decisions today:
- Who will you connect with by the end of this year that will help you stay destiny-focused? This is all about accountability.
- What is the first step you will take toward making progress toward your destiny? By when?
- What excuses do you know you’ve allowed yourself to use that you will eliminate from your speak and your mindset, moving forward?
It’s a new day, folks, and I’m really excited for all that lies ahead in all of our decision-making processes moving forward. So here’s a small snippet on how I’m doing it: I had to make a decision between a new purse and a few new clothing items I wanted…not needed, but just wanted, and some new Living Fabulously Fierce t-shirts since so many people have been asking for them. Now I could’ve just gotten what I wanted because I’m all about treating yourself every now and then, especially during your birthmonthJ But, having to choose one over the other, I had to go with the decision that would help make progress toward fulfilling my destiny. Sales from the t-shirts will go toward program for young girls. How could I not? Join me in this new w perspective!!!
Soundtrack of the week: Will I Am’s It’s a New Day